Ghost of the laughing horse-By Ronnie Tucker

By Ronnie Tucker

Have you ever been on the threshold of death
Or it’s whispers in your ears
And pulled you closer with it’s cold grasp
Only to give you it’s bitter taste
For I have and it was on September 30th 2023

It all began with tossing and turning all night long
And when I finally got out of bed
It was like electricity playing in my head
Something was not right
I could feel it, I was dizzy though I have been dizzy the past days

Didn’t think nothing of it then I just went about my ways
But somehow I felt today was different
Something just felt strange for my thoughts were kind of distant echoing through my mind
Everything was hazy

I went about doing my same routines
Moving forward as if in a scene
Around me I felt like I was buzzing
lights like stars surrounded my focus
Then a friend called so I decided to go and visit to get away for a while
To shift the moment
And step ahead

Once in there place we talked and spilled the time
As I slowly faded like I was in another place or zone
The bright light grew brighter
My head was swimming
I felt like I was drowning in some ethereal plane

Bright sparkles electrified my vision
So now to reel the tape forward a bit
And to fade to slow-mo
In the ride back I was drifting as the voice of my friend was echoing

As the bright light beckoned my sight I thought I saw Angels smiling so hued in lavender and blue
Slowly I tried to answer
But I could only form a one letter word no, no,no

As I got out of the ride
My feet felt like clay
They were moving but I was not
My mind was so full of electricity
As my vision blurred in the bright light

It was as if I was suddenly being beckoned to the bright white
Like someone was calling me
Come on over whispered in my ears
So beautiful, so mesmerizing
My feet gave away as I wandered in spirit form closer to the edge

In reality I hit the ground
Like a rock I skipped my ocean
As If i was kicked out of the light
And I did return but I was still spinning and reeling
I slowly got up and tried to stand

In my head was the voice calling me again
Come on over, just come to the light
White Explosions filled my sight
Down I went again trying hard to go to the bright light
As my mind continued spinning

I swear I thought i saw the hued Angel’s in lavender and blue
Calling to me their wings surrounded in golden beams
As i lay and could not speak
Reality slowly Godsmacked me
I reach for the light in my eyes
But I could not grasp it

I heard distant voices in my ears
My friend calling me pleading for me to get up
As the light beckoned me I just could not touch it’s sound
Slowly I got up on my feet
My legs felt like rubber

I was tasting the sound of the bright light again
For it was not letting go
As the light twisted and the colors burst
My legs would not function
And slowly the light encompassed me in it’s brilliance

And my body felt like water
And I melted to the ground again
I felt like my time had come to go to the light
My mind was spinning
And I was blinded
All reality was slipping away
Only for a moment but it seemed like a long time

Suddenly I was rejected and the light would not let me in
And I fell out of the spectrum
Slowly I was back in my body
But still in a daze
Vision still in haze

I got to my feet again
And somehow poured myself in my friends vehicle
All I heard was let me call an ambulance over and over
All i could get out with slurred speech was no, no, no, home, home

I don’t know how i made it in my house by myself
But i did
Into my bed i fell
Saying to myself if i die
I will die in my sleep in the peace of my own home

Hours later I awoke relieved that I was still alive
But I was messed up still not quite in focus
And very weak
For the light was the essence of heaven and a piece of eternity
and my time to taste it, was not today

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